My daughter and I did another 5K Fun Run two weeks ago. I was in the midst of still having pretty severe abdominal pain (If you missed those details.) so we did not finish the 5K. But I did dance for 2 hours with a 30 pound toddler on my shoulders before the run
and about another hour after the run, and walk two miles round-trip from the parking lot to the run. So I don’t feel bad about it AT ALL.
I’m proud of myself. My kid is SO on board with fun runs– as long as they involve getting crazy messy. I suppose there’s a foam run in our future. I dunno if I’m jazzed about that.
Anyway, we went, we danced, we glowed, we were tired.
In an on-going effort to make positive changes in my life, I have been trying to remember who I was before a child. I’ve heard this from a lot of moms– dads may feel it too, I don’t know. Something happens when you have a small child that makes it really easy to lose your sense of self. And I did. I used to pursue writing, photography, reading, myself. I lost all of that when I had Millie. And it may sound sad if you have never had a child– and I suppose it is, but it’s natural. I think the love of your progeny just overtakes all other passions– it’s the best thing and the only thing. For a while. Eventually your child needs you a little less and in that open space you (I) realize that you don’t know what to do. I forgot how to make myself happy, in the least depressing way someone can say that, ha!
Anyway, that plus dieting made me remember photography. A few years ago I was SO in love with photography. In those days I had access to a dark room and only myself to worry about. Add a love of decaying architecture and abandoned places, and I had a hobby that kept me moving, hiking, walking, and exploring. I did a fair amount of trespassing and it was GLORIOUS. And exciting. And maybe dangerous. I never ran into any angry or murderous hobos, so it came out ok.
This brings us to now. My kid is big enough to accompany me on field trips (although I can’t trespass into dilapidated buildings because that’s dangerous and irresponsible and I don’t want to pay for tetanus shots right now) and is just old enough to have discovered vanity and love seeing pictures of herself. SO! We have been doing a lot of walking for photo shoots. It’s been a good non-exercise exercise as well as good for my creative juices and general artistic outlets. Please enjoy some silly pic-spam of my gorgeous child (biased) and some photos that worked and some concepts that didn’t (See: creepy geisha-esque photo, lol).
She may be a bit obsessed with being a ballerina. I may be a bit obsessed with her.